Freedom Friday: Patience is YOUR Missing Virture!

Transcript

WEBVTT

00:00:10.752 --> 00:00:15.958
Hello, hello, hello and welcome once again to the Unlearned Podcast.

00:00:15.958 --> 00:00:28.425
I'm your host, ruth Abigail, aka RA, and this is Freedom Friday, where me or a friend of mine come and share something we've unlearned recently and how it has made us just just a little bit more free.

00:00:28.425 --> 00:00:34.234
So this past Tuesday we dropped our uh segment.

00:00:34.234 --> 00:00:36.966
Uh episode talks with middle adults.

00:00:36.966 --> 00:00:39.671
Uh, if you haven't listened to it, check it out.

00:00:39.671 --> 00:00:49.146
It's a really special episode because our producer, who's normally not behind the microphone or camera, came on a shout out to producer joy speaks.

00:00:49.146 --> 00:00:52.314
Uh, who is the producer of the unlearned podcast.

00:00:52.314 --> 00:00:56.747
But uh, she came on and joined us for this talk.

00:00:57.389 --> 00:00:59.112
We wanted to really have a conversation.

00:00:59.112 --> 00:01:01.203
So we've been talking the last couple of weeks.

00:01:01.203 --> 00:01:33.275
We talked about just this transition from young adulthood and some things we've had to unlearn, specifically around things like professionalism and personal and professional development, unlearning that from our 20s into where we are now, and so in that we talked a lot about transition, and so Joy wanted to have all three of us come on and talk about what we've experienced about each other in the seasons of transition.

00:01:33.275 --> 00:01:59.490
We have been friends for 20 years, which is wild to say, and we wanted to come on and just share with um, share with you all, and kind of just reflect ourselves on what, what, what we've seen in each other as we've transitioned from those, you know, from when we first saw each other 20 years ago until now.

00:01:59.490 --> 00:02:03.611
And there were a couple of things that we really highlighted.

00:02:03.611 --> 00:02:13.972
I think one of the big ones was community and just how it is so crucial to have community, but also understanding that we have a very unique situation.

00:02:13.972 --> 00:02:26.080
There's a crew of us right, there's three of us on the podcast episode, but we have a few more friends who we've grown up together as adults and it's just been a really beautiful thing.

00:02:26.080 --> 00:02:37.193
But also like really unlearning, that you have to have, you know, a friend group that's been around for 20 years to really, uh, grow through transition, you don't.

00:02:37.193 --> 00:02:55.241
I mean, there are things like mentors, um, teachers, pastors, um, you know, leaders in your workplace, other people who can attest to how you transition, it can help you through those transitions, and so that was one thing we talked about.

00:02:55.762 --> 00:02:57.567
I think the other thing was really interesting.

00:02:57.567 --> 00:03:08.805
We really kind of shared about what we saw in each other that we didn't necessarily expect to see in each other and how we're really.

00:03:08.805 --> 00:03:22.383
It's really exciting to see how we've developed, and it just kind of made me think about, you know, in that season, one of the things that I we had the privilege of doing is making mistakes.

00:03:22.383 --> 00:03:23.609
We had the privilege of making mistakes.

00:03:23.609 --> 00:03:24.612
We had the privilege of doing is making mistakes.

00:03:24.612 --> 00:03:26.058
We had the privilege of making mistakes.

00:03:26.058 --> 00:03:38.052
We had the privilege of doing things that we weren't really sure about, of doing things badly, of doing things for free, right that we didn't get paid for, of doing a ton of different things.

00:03:38.052 --> 00:03:44.979
We had the privilege of being burned out, and what I mean by that is we only had ourselves.

00:03:44.979 --> 00:04:11.515
We were starting out in life and we could just take advantage of every opportunity, and so one of the things that I think is so important for us to unlearn is that we have to unlearn that it takes that that there are some things that there are some processes you can shorten, there are some things you can do to move faster through right.

00:04:11.515 --> 00:04:12.298
There are some things.

00:04:12.298 --> 00:04:20.930
Sometimes there are steps, sometimes there are leaps, but but I I really think that there are.

00:04:20.930 --> 00:04:47.581
There are some crucial things that you can't skip, crucial moments, crucial moments in your life, seasons in your life that you just can't skip, and one of those is the season of mistakes, the season of taking on more than you probably should on more than you probably should, or the seasons of particularly doing things for free.

00:04:50.024 --> 00:05:01.788
I remember when I was teaching piano lessons and I was teaching in college and I was really doing it for credit, right, and I did not.

00:05:01.788 --> 00:05:03.714
I wasn't really getting paid for it.

00:05:03.714 --> 00:05:08.547
I was getting paid a little bit, I think just a little bit of stipend, but was anything to really speak about.

00:05:08.547 --> 00:05:14.488
And, quite frankly, I didn't feel that great about charging because I was learning and so you know.

00:05:14.488 --> 00:05:21.230
Then I moved on and I would, I would teach on my own, but it wasn't a lot for a lot of money at all.

00:05:21.230 --> 00:05:24.002
It was barely anything.

00:05:24.002 --> 00:05:28.331
It was just something to say hey, yeah, you can give this to me because I was learning.

00:05:28.331 --> 00:05:38.367
I remember playing for different, uh, different churches and just in, in play, I played in church for free forever, right, I was learning.

00:05:38.367 --> 00:05:45.391
Uh, I would, I would do things, I would intern for free, I would do things, I would intern for free, I would do all these things to gain experience because I could.

00:05:46.088 --> 00:05:58.613
I think now this concept of doing things for free or doing things in kind of slow motion is really foreign, because we live in a world where everything is sped up.

00:05:58.613 --> 00:06:00.872
Everything is sped up.

00:06:00.872 --> 00:06:04.475
You can time lapse your video.

00:06:04.475 --> 00:06:05.502
You, you can see everything.

00:06:05.502 --> 00:06:10.473
Something that happened in an hour, you can see it in 30 seconds.

00:06:10.473 --> 00:06:37.192
We are constantly put in the videos of people going from broke to rich are put together in a clip of a minute to show you what your life can be like if you just X, y, z, and while those things are cool and while those things are really kind of be inspiring, there's also some deception to it.

00:06:37.192 --> 00:06:47.459
We don't see the behind the scenes of what it takes to really get to that point, and so if we're not careful, we'll expect something before we're ready for it.

00:06:47.985 --> 00:06:56.954
And I think that one of the best things that has happened to me in my life is that I've had to wait on things that I wanted, right.

00:06:56.954 --> 00:07:00.766
I've had to wait on things I've wanted.

00:07:00.766 --> 00:07:01.848
There you go.

00:07:01.848 --> 00:07:03.641
I've had to wait on things I've wanted, right.

00:07:03.641 --> 00:07:09.983
Sometimes the worst thing that can happen to you is you get your dreams too early because you're not ready for them.

00:07:09.983 --> 00:07:11.687
There are so many things.

00:07:11.687 --> 00:07:22.182
There's so much personal development and character development that's necessary to really have in order to keep what it is you desire.

00:07:22.562 --> 00:07:29.701
I think we have to understand and something we another thing we have to unlearn is that just because you desire it now doesn't mean you're ready for it now.

00:07:29.701 --> 00:07:30.944
It doesn't.

00:07:30.944 --> 00:07:31.444
It doesn't.

00:07:31.444 --> 00:07:32.867
It just doesn't work that way.

00:07:32.867 --> 00:07:52.372
But again, we are so in a culture that glorifies speed and glorifies leaps and bounds and glorifies extreme change really quickly, that we and we see these stories over and over and somehow we think that we should have that too.

00:07:52.372 --> 00:08:06.826
It just doesn't work that way for everyone, and I just want to encourage people out there who are still in your early seasons right, and it's not necessarily an age thing, it can also be just.

00:08:06.826 --> 00:08:16.312
Maybe there's a season of life that you're in that's new and you've started over and you're starting a new profession.

00:08:16.312 --> 00:08:20.923
Or maybe you just started a family, and that's just new, right.

00:08:20.923 --> 00:08:25.233
Maybe you are going back to school that's new.

00:08:25.880 --> 00:08:33.357
We can't expect, when we are just getting started in anything, to be on top immediately.

00:08:33.357 --> 00:08:39.392
We've got to work our way there, and sometimes that means making sacrifices that aren't as pleasant.

00:08:39.392 --> 00:08:48.427
But if you can do that, then you'll be ready for, you'll be ready for what it is you really want, when it's time that it comes.

00:08:48.427 --> 00:08:54.581
I think I I see this a lot with younger professionals.

00:08:54.581 --> 00:09:06.034
I see it all the time where there is a an itch to be, to have to have this responsibility.

00:09:06.034 --> 00:09:10.500
There's an itch to be making a certain amount of money really quickly.

00:09:10.500 --> 00:09:23.067
There's this itch to have your opinions and things taken immediately, right, your ideas taken and put out immediately.

00:09:23.067 --> 00:09:24.591
There's this itch to do that.

00:09:24.591 --> 00:09:37.572
And while there's nothing wrong with that, there's also the reality of the privilege of saying, okay, I'm just going to wait because I'll be more ready later.

00:09:37.572 --> 00:09:43.517
Right now, I'm just kind of getting started and now is the time to do.

00:09:43.517 --> 00:09:46.871
What happens when you get started again, you have the privilege of making mistakes.

00:09:46.871 --> 00:09:51.753
You have the privilege of trying things and and failing at them and then learning from it.

00:09:51.753 --> 00:09:53.799
Right, you have the privilege of doing that.

00:09:53.799 --> 00:09:54.761
Don't waste it.

00:09:54.761 --> 00:09:57.126
It's going to prepare you for what's next.

00:09:57.126 --> 00:09:59.892
So I hope that helps.

00:09:59.892 --> 00:10:01.581
I just I don't know.

00:10:01.581 --> 00:10:02.687
I see that so much.

00:10:02.749 --> 00:10:11.682
And again, as we were talking about it, the three of us uh on on this last segment of just what transition looked like and how we saw each other.

00:10:11.682 --> 00:10:17.634
Uh, from back then till now, we have seen each other through so many of those.

00:10:17.634 --> 00:10:23.028
We've seen each other have to endure bad jobs, bad bosses, bad pay.

00:10:23.028 --> 00:10:23.910
We've had to.

00:10:23.910 --> 00:10:27.523
We've had to endure, um uh, failed relationships.

00:10:27.523 --> 00:10:28.284
We've had to.

00:10:28.284 --> 00:10:29.950
We've watched each other do that.

00:10:29.950 --> 00:10:45.687
We've watched each other go through loss and tragedy and we've lost, watched each other have to scrape and scram, live in places they don't like and have, you know, live in, have living situations that are not the most conducive and that are not fun to be in.

00:10:45.687 --> 00:11:00.407
Right, we've had to watch people go through school when it's tough and move from city to city and not have friends, and I mean there's just, there's so many different errors errors that's not errors.

00:11:00.427 --> 00:11:05.105
There's a word I'm looking for in our lives that we've had to watch, and we will continue to do that.

00:11:05.105 --> 00:11:12.932
Right, we're going to continue to do that because every there's a there's there's opportunity for newness all throughout your life.

00:11:12.932 --> 00:11:15.847
It's not just about the age that you are.

00:11:15.847 --> 00:11:19.580
There are different stages we will all enter into At some point.

00:11:19.580 --> 00:11:23.708
We're going to be the baby in the room we room.

00:11:23.708 --> 00:11:25.533
I got married a year ago.

00:11:25.533 --> 00:11:28.544
I'm the baby in the room when I'm with married couples.

00:11:28.544 --> 00:11:30.389
I'm at the beginning.

00:11:30.428 --> 00:11:38.153
I can't expect to have this incredible marriage that I see people with 20, 30, 40 years in have in year one.

00:11:38.153 --> 00:11:47.765
It's unrealistic, and I have to be willing to endure some of the things that a lot of those couples endured in their first couple of years.

00:11:47.765 --> 00:12:05.455
And it's not always going to be pleasant and it's not always going to be easy, but it's part of the path, and so I just want to encourage us to remember we got to unlearn that and that patience is necessary in your growth towards your desired outcome.

00:12:05.455 --> 00:12:08.265
Patience is the name of the game.

00:12:08.265 --> 00:12:11.610
Patience with the process, not trying to rush it.

00:12:11.610 --> 00:12:25.984
Enduring discomfort, enduring the things you don't like, enduring the non-ideal situations, knowing that you're going to build up enough stamina and character to keep whatever is coming your way after you get there.

00:12:25.984 --> 00:12:28.668
I bet that is all.

00:12:29.489 --> 00:12:33.600
Be sure to stay tuned, for we're going to drop.

00:12:33.600 --> 00:12:34.783
We're actually going to drop.

00:12:34.783 --> 00:12:43.506
Next week will be the end of season one of our talks with middle adults segment.

00:12:43.506 --> 00:12:45.186
We're really excited about that.

00:12:45.186 --> 00:12:51.850
We're gonna come out with season two, but in the meantime we are going to do a series on entrepreneurship.

00:12:51.850 --> 00:12:59.306
We're talking to entrepreneurs and just what is it that we can unlearn about entrepreneurship?

00:12:59.306 --> 00:13:06.410
So be on the lookout for that it's gonna be great and we will be back again next week with another Freedom Friday.

00:13:06.410 --> 00:13:13.692
But until then, y'all, let's keep unlearning together so that we can experience more freedom, peace.

00:13:13.692 --> 00:13:20.609
Thank you once again for listening to the Unlearned Podcast.

00:13:20.609 --> 00:13:24.764
We would love to hear your comments and your feedback about the episode.

00:13:24.764 --> 00:13:31.500
Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think.

00:13:31.500 --> 00:13:37.844
We're looking forward to the next time, when we are able to unlearn together to move forward towards freedom.

00:13:37.844 --> 00:13:38.748
See you then.

Freedom Friday: Patience is YOUR Missing Virture!

Listen On

Recent Episodes